March 20, 2011
So, here's another Sunday, almost gone. I hate how fast the weekends go, and then how slowly the weekdays in between trudge by. I mean, I love my job, and when I say I love my job, I really mean I LOVE my job. My students make me happy. They make me laugh. They make me feel complete. They inspire me in ways I've never been inspired before. I find myself gushing to their parents at conferences as if they are MY kids and I'm bragging to someone about them! I learn as much from them as they learn from me. Being a teacher defines me in ways I never imagined.
But I LOVE my weekends home with my family too.
I love spending an entire day curled up on the couch with popcorn and a movie. We watched "Ernest Scared Stupid" with Harley last night, and she was petrified during parts of it, but who can really be scared of trolls who are killed with shots of MILK?! Riley doesn't really care to watch movies with the family anymore, but we did our share of that when he was younger and still enjoyed a good movie with the parents...Now it's Harley. That's the thing with having kids 6 years apart. Riley got 6 years as the "only child", everything about him, everything for him, etc. Then there was the "shared time" with he and Harley together where they were little together and we had those precious years of the park and the zoo and the state fair and Elephant Hall and Chuck E. Cheese, and the Children's Museum. I would give ANYTHING to have those years back because even though the whole time they were happening I was taking pictures and telling myself to treasure them because they go by fast, they DID go by fast and now they're over. Those were the most wonderful years of my life, watching my babies be "little" together...
Now Harley's experiencing the "only child" years while Riley is a teenager, while he goes through that stage where parents are NOT cool, where he knows more than we do, where his world revolves around himself first and foremost. And that's OK. That's normal and that's typical and that's how life is. And as long as he still hugs me, says he loves me no matter who is around to hear him, and kisses me when we part ways, that's what matters to me because that's how I know he still loves us and still needs us, still does want us around. In less than two years Harley will start Middle School and Riley will start his SENIOR year and it's going to be so hard. SOOOO HARD. It makes me tear up to think about it. Yes, being a teacher defines me. But so does being a mom and giving my babies everything in the world that I can emotionally and mentally.
Yet, here I am, alone in the house on a Sunday evening, supper not mad yet, laundry not done, blogging...Rob ran to the store for something we needed for supper. Riley finished skateboarding and is now cooling off with a swim. Harley is playing at a friend's house. The dogs are outside enjoying the beautiful weather. Two cats are on the deck, one is asleep in the window. The bunny is resting in her cage behind me while I type...I don't like the empty house. I don't like the silence. I miss my babies laughing in the yard. I miss giving them baths and wiping their faces. I miss being the number one, most important thing in their life.
I wish it weren't Sunday...I wish time would slow down...I wish things didn't have to change...
But I LOVE my weekends home with my family too.
I love spending an entire day curled up on the couch with popcorn and a movie. We watched "Ernest Scared Stupid" with Harley last night, and she was petrified during parts of it, but who can really be scared of trolls who are killed with shots of MILK?! Riley doesn't really care to watch movies with the family anymore, but we did our share of that when he was younger and still enjoyed a good movie with the parents...Now it's Harley. That's the thing with having kids 6 years apart. Riley got 6 years as the "only child", everything about him, everything for him, etc. Then there was the "shared time" with he and Harley together where they were little together and we had those precious years of the park and the zoo and the state fair and Elephant Hall and Chuck E. Cheese, and the Children's Museum. I would give ANYTHING to have those years back because even though the whole time they were happening I was taking pictures and telling myself to treasure them because they go by fast, they DID go by fast and now they're over. Those were the most wonderful years of my life, watching my babies be "little" together...
Now Harley's experiencing the "only child" years while Riley is a teenager, while he goes through that stage where parents are NOT cool, where he knows more than we do, where his world revolves around himself first and foremost. And that's OK. That's normal and that's typical and that's how life is. And as long as he still hugs me, says he loves me no matter who is around to hear him, and kisses me when we part ways, that's what matters to me because that's how I know he still loves us and still needs us, still does want us around. In less than two years Harley will start Middle School and Riley will start his SENIOR year and it's going to be so hard. SOOOO HARD. It makes me tear up to think about it. Yes, being a teacher defines me. But so does being a mom and giving my babies everything in the world that I can emotionally and mentally.
Yet, here I am, alone in the house on a Sunday evening, supper not mad yet, laundry not done, blogging...Rob ran to the store for something we needed for supper. Riley finished skateboarding and is now cooling off with a swim. Harley is playing at a friend's house. The dogs are outside enjoying the beautiful weather. Two cats are on the deck, one is asleep in the window. The bunny is resting in her cage behind me while I type...I don't like the empty house. I don't like the silence. I miss my babies laughing in the yard. I miss giving them baths and wiping their faces. I miss being the number one, most important thing in their life.
I wish it weren't Sunday...I wish time would slow down...I wish things didn't have to change...
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